In the days following the tragic murder of George Floyd my mobile was constantly vibrating with requests for assistance from white, middle-class, middle-aged chairmen and CEOs that I had lots of time and respect for.
They felt pushed by their colleagues to initiate a much sought-after conversation about race in their respective businesses, but were not confident on how to go about it.
They were paralysed by the fear of saying the wrong thing. I found myself performing supportive and reassuring 15-minute Zoom based coaching sessions, one after another. I encouraged them to get going and not worry about being perfect, because everyone would get their intent and just to be prepared to apologise for any slip ups. The only mistake, I said, was the one you don’t learn from.
Mike Coupe needed no such encouragement. Whilst CEO of Sainsbury’s, he decided that at the next meeting of its operating ooard (the top 40 leaders in Sainsbury’s), they would all have ‘inclusion’ inserted as a 20% component of their annual bonus.
This would come as a bit of a surprise to many, but he was determined to proceed, despite the misgivings of some of his colleagues.
I met Mike the morning of the meeting. He was friendly, and fully focussed on getting his message through to his team. He had reams of evidence, including engagement surveys and 360-degree feedback data. His case was very hard to argue with.
Yet I felt he needed something different to win the hearts and minds of his people. Numbers and data rarely create excitement, and despite the flawless logic, there was little to engage them emotionally. In order to energise them around such an important issue, it needed some EQ, not just IQ.
Having had a chat around this, I suggested that he might want to share a very personal story on why inclusion had become so high and urgent on his agenda. He furrowed his brow and walked off to think about it.
Managers talk strategy; leaders tell stories. As the old African proverb tells us, “Until the lions have their own storytellers, the tales of the hunt will always favour the hunter”. Stories work, and can move even the most ardent opposition.
Mike kicked off with the following personal story. He was born in a small village near Solihull, and was the very first member of his extended family to go to university. On arrival, he was instantly made to feel that he had the wrong accent. At lunch, he struggled to work out what to do with the vast array of glasses, cutlery and crockery laid out in front of him. For the first big weekend event, he had no idea what ‘white tie’ was.
Overall, he felt really excluded and lonely – his first year at university was one of the worst years of his life.
At the end of that first year two fellow students, seeing that he was feeling lost and isolated, befriended him and started to ‘show him the ropes’. This enabled him to better navigate the institution and he quickly learned the informal rules of engagement. His third year was one for the best years of his life. He felt included.
Mike had the complete and undivided attention of everyone in the room. He went on: “When I walk around our warehouses, depots and stores, far too many of our 180,000 colleagues feel invisible – until now. I need you all to join me in trying to ensure that no one who works for Sainsbury’s ever feels excluded again. We need to give them a feeling of belonging, with leaders they can believe in.”
By now, there was an amazing buzz and energy in the room. Everyone was fully engaged and well up for this particular important journey.
Mike’s very personal story shared his own vulnerability and touched many in the room to put inclusion at the heart of what Sainsbury’s stands for.
Most of the chairmen and CEOs I’ve spoken to and coached have heeded my advice and engaged with their people. Not one of them was anywhere near perfect. Some were quite clumsy, but every one of them was appreciated for making the effort and initiating an important dialogue for all the right reasons.
As Maya Angelou famously said, “Not everyone will remember exactly what you said, but everyone will remember how you made them feel.”
Image courtesy of René Carayol
In the days following the tragic murder of George Floyd my mobile was constantly vibrating with requests for assistance from white, middle-class, middle-aged chairmen and CEOs that I had lots of time and respect for.
They felt pushed by their colleagues to initiate a much sought-after conversation about race in their respective businesses, but were not confident on how to go about it.
They were paralysed by the fear of saying the wrong thing. I found myself performing supportive and reassuring 15-minute Zoom based coaching sessions, one after another. I encouraged them to get going and not worry about being perfect, because everyone would get their intent and just to be prepared to apologise for any slip ups. The only mistake, I said, was the one you don’t learn from.
Mike Coupe needed no such encouragement. Whilst CEO of Sainsbury’s, he decided that at the next meeting of its operating ooard (the top 40 leaders in Sainsbury’s), they would all have ‘inclusion’ inserted as a 20% component of their annual bonus.
This would come as a bit of a surprise to many, but he was determined to proceed, despite the misgivings of some of his colleagues.
I met Mike the morning of the meeting. He was friendly, and fully focussed on getting his message through to his team. He had reams of evidence, including engagement surveys and 360-degree feedback data. His case was very hard to argue with.
Yet I felt he needed something different to win the hearts and minds of his people. Numbers and data rarely create excitement, and despite the flawless logic, there was little to engage them emotionally. In order to energise them around such an important issue, it needed some EQ, not just IQ.
Having had a chat around this, I suggested that he might want to share a very personal story on why inclusion had become so high and urgent on his agenda. He furrowed his brow and walked off to think about it.
Managers talk strategy; leaders tell stories. As the old African proverb tells us, “Until the lions have their own storytellers, the tales of the hunt will always favour the hunter”. Stories work, and can move even the most ardent opposition.
Mike kicked off with the following personal story. He was born in a small village near Solihull, and was the very first member of his extended family to go to university. On arrival, he was instantly made to feel that he had the wrong accent. At lunch, he struggled to work out what to do with the vast array of glasses, cutlery and crockery laid out in front of him. For the first big weekend event, he had no idea what ‘white tie’ was.
Overall, he felt really excluded and lonely – his first year at university was one of the worst years of his life.
At the end of that first year two fellow students, seeing that he was feeling lost and isolated, befriended him and started to ‘show him the ropes’. This enabled him to better navigate the institution and he quickly learned the informal rules of engagement. His third year was one for the best years of his life. He felt included.
Mike had the complete and undivided attention of everyone in the room. He went on: “When I walk around our warehouses, depots and stores, far too many of our 180,000 colleagues feel invisible – until now. I need you all to join me in trying to ensure that no one who works for Sainsbury’s ever feels excluded again. We need to give them a feeling of belonging, with leaders they can believe in.”
By now, there was an amazing buzz and energy in the room. Everyone was fully engaged and well up for this particular important journey.
Mike’s very personal story shared his own vulnerability and touched many in the room to put inclusion at the heart of what Sainsbury’s stands for.
Most of the chairmen and CEOs I’ve spoken to and coached have heeded my advice and engaged with their people. Not one of them was anywhere near perfect. Some were quite clumsy, but every one of them was appreciated for making the effort and initiating an important dialogue for all the right reasons.
As Maya Angelou famously said, “Not everyone will remember exactly what you said, but everyone will remember how you made them feel.”
Image courtesy of René Carayol
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